ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FEATURES Tuesday, June 1st, 2021. Back in 1998, advice columnist Abigail Van Buren took a letter from a woman who was deeply upset about her husband urinating in their front yard. Her response was, frankly, not terribly helpful. This is not a subject that’s often discussed, but I suspect the practice is not unusual. Dogs and cats urinate to mark

their

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PICTURES OF ENGINES OF OLD FARM EQUIPMENT Humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Thanks to friend of the site Colin T., I learned about this supposed big fan of big fans. Unfortunately for the unnamed trespasser, his supposed avocation led to him getting trapped for multiple days, ultimately necessitating a rescue by the

authorities.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Don’t Do Cicadas ∞. Don’t Do Cicadas. ∞. Saturday, May 22nd, 2021. Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline: Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus That Makes Their Butts Fall Off. Well, that’s horrifying. It seems the fungus replaces the ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: EXPLAIN YOURSELF, BALLY SPORTS My confusion was a result of the fact that Bally Sports is a brand-new entity, one which came into existence less than a month ago, on March 31, 2021. In years past, these games had all been broadcast on Fox Sports channels, but that much more established name was now gone. In its place were channels like “Bally Spots West” and “Bally ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: BARVD Tree of Blood ∞. Friday, December 7th, 2018. Thanks to a tweet shared by friend-of-the-site Daniel Jalkut, I’ve got a Barvd one-off to ruin your appetite today. As The Atlantic reports, this is an intact blood clot in the exact shape of the right bronchial tree.

It’s so very red!

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FEATURES Tuesday, June 1st, 2021. Back in 1998, advice columnist Abigail Van Buren took a letter from a woman who was deeply upset about her husband urinating in their front yard. Her response was, frankly, not terribly helpful. This is not a subject that’s often discussed, but I suspect the practice is not unusual. Dogs and cats urinate to mark

their

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PICTURES OF ENGINES OF OLD FARM EQUIPMENT Humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Thanks to friend of the site Colin T., I learned about this supposed big fan of big fans. Unfortunately for the unnamed trespasser, his supposed avocation led to him getting trapped for multiple days, ultimately necessitating a rescue by the

authorities.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Don’t Do Cicadas ∞. Don’t Do Cicadas. ∞. Saturday, May 22nd, 2021. Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline: Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus That Makes Their Butts Fall Off. Well, that’s horrifying. It seems the fungus replaces the ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: EXPLAIN YOURSELF, BALLY SPORTS My confusion was a result of the fact that Bally Sports is a brand-new entity, one which came into existence less than a month ago, on March 31, 2021. In years past, these games had all been broadcast on Fox Sports channels, but that much more established name was now gone. In its place were channels like “Bally Spots West” and “Bally ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: BARVD Tree of Blood ∞. Friday, December 7th, 2018. Thanks to a tweet shared by friend-of-the-site Daniel Jalkut, I’ve got a Barvd one-off to ruin your appetite today. As The Atlantic reports, this is an intact blood clot in the exact shape of the right bronchial tree.

It’s so very red!

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FEATURES Tuesday, June 1st, 2021. Back in 1998, advice columnist Abigail Van Buren took a letter from a woman who was deeply upset about her husband urinating in their front yard. Her response was, frankly, not terribly helpful. This is not a subject that’s often discussed, but I suspect the practice is not unusual. Dogs and cats urinate to mark

their

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THEY’LL HAVE TO FOLLOW-UP ON THAT ONE Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: I Put a Spell on You. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Thursday, May 13th, 2021. Yesterday, the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2021 class. I was pleased to see that one of my favorite bands, Foo Fighters, is getting the call. Curious who else is getting inducted? Why, none other than famous rock and roll legend Jay-Z, of

course.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A RETROSPECTIVE OF THE RAID THAT GOT BIN Tuesday, May 11th, 2021. The beginning of this month marked a full decade since the death of Osama Bin Laden, and Politico put together a remarkable retrospective of the time before and after the raid, from the people who were involved. It’s a long and worthwhile read. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé:. Yours is a pathetic situation, and all of my sympathy is with you. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: LINKS A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé:. Yours is a pathetic situation, and all of my sympathy is with you. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: USPS’S NEW “PREMIUM” TRACKING According to the bulletin on the USPS News Link site 1, which was updated in early February to promote this new feature: USPS Premium Tracking is aimed at customers who need evidence of delivery to resolve disputes and claims; evidence of mailing or delivery and delivery attempts for legal and court proceedings; and an official,

authentic

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: BARVD Tree of Blood ∞. Friday, December 7th, 2018. Thanks to a tweet shared by friend-of-the-site Daniel Jalkut, I’ve got a Barvd one-off to ruin your appetite today. As The Atlantic reports, this is an intact blood clot in the exact shape of the right bronchial tree.

It’s so very red!

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PROS AND CONS: VIBRAM FIVEFINGERS Pro: The Vibram FiveFingers are relatively inexpensive compared to most running shoes. Con: Nevertheless, I have effectively paid $80 to not wear shoes. All in all, I think the Vibram FiveFingers are pretty great, and I’d definitely recommend them to other runners. You’ll need to ease into them, and at times you may be forced back into ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FEATURES Tuesday, June 1st, 2021. Back in 1998, advice columnist Abigail Van Buren took a letter from a woman who was deeply upset about her husband urinating in their front yard. Her response was, frankly, not terribly helpful. This is not a subject that’s often discussed, but I suspect the practice is not unusual. Dogs and cats urinate to mark

their

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PICTURES OF ENGINES OF OLD FARM EQUIPMENT Humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Thanks to friend of the site Colin T., I learned about this supposed big fan of big fans. Unfortunately for the unnamed trespasser, his supposed avocation led to him getting trapped for multiple days, ultimately necessitating a rescue by the

authorities.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Don’t Do Cicadas ∞. Don’t Do Cicadas. ∞. Saturday, May 22nd, 2021. Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline: Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus That Makes Their Butts Fall Off. Well, that’s horrifying. It seems the fungus replaces the ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: EXPLAIN YOURSELF, BALLY SPORTS My confusion was a result of the fact that Bally Sports is a brand-new entity, one which came into existence less than a month ago, on March 31, 2021. In years past, these games had all been broadcast on Fox Sports channels, but that much more established name was now gone. In its place were channels like “Bally Spots West” and “Bally ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: BARVD Tree of Blood ∞. Friday, December 7th, 2018. Thanks to a tweet shared by friend-of-the-site Daniel Jalkut, I’ve got a Barvd one-off to ruin your appetite today. As The Atlantic reports, this is an intact blood clot in the exact shape of the right bronchial tree.

It’s so very red!

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FEATURES Tuesday, June 1st, 2021. Back in 1998, advice columnist Abigail Van Buren took a letter from a woman who was deeply upset about her husband urinating in their front yard. Her response was, frankly, not terribly helpful. This is not a subject that’s often discussed, but I suspect the practice is not unusual. Dogs and cats urinate to mark

their

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PICTURES OF ENGINES OF OLD FARM EQUIPMENT Humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Thanks to friend of the site Colin T., I learned about this supposed big fan of big fans. Unfortunately for the unnamed trespasser, his supposed avocation led to him getting trapped for multiple days, ultimately necessitating a rescue by the

authorities.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Don’t Do Cicadas ∞. Don’t Do Cicadas. ∞. Saturday, May 22nd, 2021. Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline: Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus That Makes Their Butts Fall Off. Well, that’s horrifying. It seems the fungus replaces the ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: EXPLAIN YOURSELF, BALLY SPORTS My confusion was a result of the fact that Bally Sports is a brand-new entity, one which came into existence less than a month ago, on March 31, 2021. In years past, these games had all been broadcast on Fox Sports channels, but that much more established name was now gone. In its place were channels like “Bally Spots West” and “Bally ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: BARVD Tree of Blood ∞. Friday, December 7th, 2018. Thanks to a tweet shared by friend-of-the-site Daniel Jalkut, I’ve got a Barvd one-off to ruin your appetite today. As The Atlantic reports, this is an intact blood clot in the exact shape of the right bronchial tree.

It’s so very red!

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FEATURES Tuesday, June 1st, 2021. Back in 1998, advice columnist Abigail Van Buren took a letter from a woman who was deeply upset about her husband urinating in their front yard. Her response was, frankly, not terribly helpful. This is not a subject that’s often discussed, but I suspect the practice is not unusual. Dogs and cats urinate to mark

their

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THEY’LL HAVE TO FOLLOW-UP ON THAT ONE Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: I Put a Spell on You. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Thursday, May 13th, 2021. Yesterday, the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2021 class. I was pleased to see that one of my favorite bands, Foo Fighters, is getting the call. Curious who else is getting inducted? Why, none other than famous rock and roll legend Jay-Z, of

course.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A RETROSPECTIVE OF THE RAID THAT GOT BIN Tuesday, May 11th, 2021. The beginning of this month marked a full decade since the death of Osama Bin Laden, and Politico put together a remarkable retrospective of the time before and after the raid, from the people who were involved. It’s a long and worthwhile read. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé:. Yours is a pathetic situation, and all of my sympathy is with you. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: LINKS A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé:. Yours is a pathetic situation, and all of my sympathy is with you. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: USPS’S NEW “PREMIUM” TRACKING According to the bulletin on the USPS News Link site 1, which was updated in early February to promote this new feature: USPS Premium Tracking is aimed at customers who need evidence of delivery to resolve disputes and claims; evidence of mailing or delivery and delivery attempts for legal and court proceedings; and an official,

authentic

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: BARVD Tree of Blood ∞. Friday, December 7th, 2018. Thanks to a tweet shared by friend-of-the-site Daniel Jalkut, I’ve got a Barvd one-off to ruin your appetite today. As The Atlantic reports, this is an intact blood clot in the exact shape of the right bronchial tree.

It’s so very red!

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PROS AND CONS: VIBRAM FIVEFINGERS Pro: The Vibram FiveFingers are relatively inexpensive compared to most running shoes. Con: Nevertheless, I have effectively paid $80 to not wear shoes. All in all, I think the Vibram FiveFingers are pretty great, and I’d definitely recommend them to other runners. You’ll need to ease into them, and at times you may be forced back into ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVESSEE MORE ON

ONEFOOTTSUNAMI.COM

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PICTURES OF ENGINES OF OLD FARM EQUIPMENT Humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Thanks to friend of the site Colin T., I learned about this supposed big fan of big fans. Unfortunately for the unnamed trespasser, his supposed avocation led to him getting trapped for multiple days, ultimately necessitating a rescue by the

authorities.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THEY’LL HAVE TO FOLLOW-UP ON THAT ONE Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: I Put a Spell on You. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Finally. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline:. Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m able to avoid the need to really understand our

current status.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: WE THE PIKACHUS OF CHILE, IN ORDER TO Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: The Bell Tolls for Glen. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a chair on the front lawn ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF Humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Following up on yesterday’s piece, this Washington Post article is worth a read. It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVESSEE MORE ON

ONEFOOTTSUNAMI.COM

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PICTURES OF ENGINES OF OLD FARM EQUIPMENT Humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Thanks to friend of the site Colin T., I learned about this supposed big fan of big fans. Unfortunately for the unnamed trespasser, his supposed avocation led to him getting trapped for multiple days, ultimately necessitating a rescue by the

authorities.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THEY’LL HAVE TO FOLLOW-UP ON THAT ONE Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: I Put a Spell on You. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Finally. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline:. Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m able to avoid the need to really understand our

current status.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: WE THE PIKACHUS OF CHILE, IN ORDER TO Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: The Bell Tolls for Glen. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a chair on the front lawn ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF Humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Following up on yesterday’s piece, this Washington Post article is worth a read. It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVES Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Finally. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THEY’LL HAVE TO FOLLOW-UP ON THAT ONE Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: I Put a Spell on You. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FEATURES Update (May 22, 2021): An anonymous reader purports to have texted the number on the sign, and received this reply: So apparently, the answer is actually that this sign was placed by a volunteer who isn’t directly associated with the dog, and who re-uses signs. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: RUNNING In miserable rainy weather, American Desiree Linden took the women’s crown in the 122nd running of the Boston Marathon yesterday.It was the first Boston victory by an American woman in 33 years, and it was a hell of a run. In a post-race interview, Linden stated that early on in the run, she felt it likely

she would drop out.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A COLLECTION OF CUTIES Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Android Issue #38538. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m able to avoid the need to really understand our

current status.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A RETROSPECTIVE OF THE RAID THAT GOT BIN The beginning of this month marked a full decade since the death of Osama Bin Laden, and Politico put together a remarkable retrospective of the time before and after the raid, from the people who were involved. It’s a long and worthwhile read. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a chair on the front lawn ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS In Colorado, certain vanity license plates are auctioned off by the state to raise money. At present, the rights to marijuana-themed license plates are being auctioned to benefit Colorado Disability Funding. Naturally, the auction began at 4:20 PM on April Fools’ Day, and ends at 4:20 PM on 4/20.. While this is certainly a clever way to raise funds to benefit the disabled community, I can ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS With any luck, NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter will fly from the surface of Mars next month. Its main purpose is to test and demonstrate the technology, but even so, it’s going to be pretty incredible. When Ingenuity flies above Mars, it will be the first known powered flight on a planet besides Earth.. To mark that occasion, NASA included a tiny scrap of muslin underneath Ingenuity’s solar ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Wednesday, June 2nd, 2021. You’re a trendsetter, an influencer, a real groundbreaker. Now thanks to CVS, when you protect yourself against COVID-19 by getting vaccinated, you’ll also have the chance to win a “pleasure” cruise. Catch the next pandemic before it gets

popular.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: AN UNEXPECTED CONSEQUENCE OF BITCOIN Yesterday, I saw the following news summary: DOJ recovers most of Colonial Pipeline ransom The Justice Department announced Monday that

it

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ABOUT One Foot Tsunami consists of humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Paul would love to thank you for reading One Foot Tsunami, but he’s too busy writing great new content for you (yes, you).Paul publishes one new post to this site each weekday and spends almost none ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVESSEE MORE ON

ONEFOOTTSUNAMI.COM

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A NICE FAMILY OUTING The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Don’t Do Cicadas ∞. Don’t Do Cicadas. ∞. Saturday, May 22nd, 2021. Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline: Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus That Makes Their Butts Fall Off. Well, that’s horrifying. It seems the fungus replaces the ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PLATELET SEARCH RESULTS Thursday, April 29th, 2021. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Wednesday, June 2nd, 2021. You’re a trendsetter, an influencer, a real groundbreaker. Now thanks to CVS, when you protect yourself against COVID-19 by getting vaccinated, you’ll also have the chance to win a “pleasure” cruise. Catch the next pandemic before it gets

popular.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: AN UNEXPECTED CONSEQUENCE OF BITCOIN Yesterday, I saw the following news summary: DOJ recovers most of Colonial Pipeline ransom The Justice Department announced Monday that

it

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ABOUT One Foot Tsunami consists of humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Paul would love to thank you for reading One Foot Tsunami, but he’s too busy writing great new content for you (yes, you).Paul publishes one new post to this site each weekday and spends almost none ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVESSEE MORE ON

ONEFOOTTSUNAMI.COM

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A NICE FAMILY OUTING The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Don’t Do Cicadas ∞. Don’t Do Cicadas. ∞. Saturday, May 22nd, 2021. Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline: Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus That Makes Their Butts Fall Off. Well, that’s horrifying. It seems the fungus replaces the ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PLATELET SEARCH RESULTS Thursday, April 29th, 2021. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ABOUT One Foot Tsunami consists of humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Paul would love to thank you for reading One Foot Tsunami, but he’s too busy writing great new content for you (yes, you).Paul publishes one new post to this site each weekday and spends almost none ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVES Perhaps you want to read all of One Foot Tsunami, since day one. Since OFT has a single post per weekday, it’s actually possible to read the whole thing. If you’re up for it, thank you, that’s quite the compliment. To read it all, start at the very first post from way back

in

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Thursday, May 13th, 2021. Yesterday, the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2021 class. I was pleased to see that one of my favorite bands, Foo Fighters, is getting the call. Curious who else is getting inducted? Why, none other than famous rock and roll legend Jay-Z, of

course.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A NICE FAMILY OUTING The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A RETROSPECTIVE OF THE RAID THAT GOT BIN The beginning of this month marked a full decade since the death of Osama Bin Laden, and Politico put together a remarkable retrospective of the time before and after the raid, from the people who were involved. It’s a long and worthwhile read. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: WE THE PIKACHUS OF CHILE, IN ORDER TO Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: The Bell Tolls for Glen. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: IMPRESSIVE CLOSING SPEED Impressive Closing Speed. ∞. Recently in Utah, a dog named Holly managed to take part in a high school relay race. She was astonishingly fast. Holly ran the final 100 meters of the race in about 10.5 seconds. That’s only about 1 second behind Usain Bolt’s world-record mark from the 2009 World Championships. It was all

captured on video

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: CAPITAL ONE’S PHOTOSHOP DISASTER The first is that Capital One is using a photograph of Samuel L. Jackson which a clumsy designer has digitally manipulated almost beyond recognition. The second is that Capital One photographed a guy who looks very much like a younger Samuel L. Jackson, even though they have access to the real thing. Honestly, I’m not sure which would be

worse.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Wednesday, June 2nd, 2021. You’re a trendsetter, an influencer, a real groundbreaker. Now thanks to CVS, when you protect yourself against COVID-19 by getting vaccinated, you’ll also have the chance to win a “pleasure” cruise. Catch the next pandemic before it gets

popular.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: AN UNEXPECTED CONSEQUENCE OF BITCOIN Yesterday, I saw the following news summary: DOJ recovers most of Colonial Pipeline ransom The Justice Department announced Monday that

it

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ABOUT One Foot Tsunami consists of humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Paul would love to thank you for reading One Foot Tsunami, but he’s too busy writing great new content for you (yes, you).Paul publishes one new post to this site each weekday and spends almost none ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVESSEE MORE ON

ONEFOOTTSUNAMI.COM

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A NICE FAMILY OUTING The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Don’t Do Cicadas ∞. Don’t Do Cicadas. ∞. Saturday, May 22nd, 2021. Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline: Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus That Makes Their Butts Fall Off. Well, that’s horrifying. It seems the fungus replaces the ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PLATELET SEARCH RESULTS Thursday, April 29th, 2021. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Wednesday, June 2nd, 2021. You’re a trendsetter, an influencer, a real groundbreaker. Now thanks to CVS, when you protect yourself against COVID-19 by getting vaccinated, you’ll also have the chance to win a “pleasure” cruise. Catch the next pandemic before it gets

popular.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: AN UNEXPECTED CONSEQUENCE OF BITCOIN Yesterday, I saw the following news summary: DOJ recovers most of Colonial Pipeline ransom The Justice Department announced Monday that

it

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ABOUT One Foot Tsunami consists of humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Paul would love to thank you for reading One Foot Tsunami, but he’s too busy writing great new content for you (yes, you).Paul publishes one new post to this site each weekday and spends almost none ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVESSEE MORE ON

ONEFOOTTSUNAMI.COM

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A NICE FAMILY OUTING The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Don’t Do Cicadas ∞. Don’t Do Cicadas. ∞. Saturday, May 22nd, 2021. Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline: Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus That Makes Their Butts Fall Off. Well, that’s horrifying. It seems the fungus replaces the ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PLATELET SEARCH RESULTS Thursday, April 29th, 2021. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ABOUT One Foot Tsunami consists of humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Paul would love to thank you for reading One Foot Tsunami, but he’s too busy writing great new content for you (yes, you).Paul publishes one new post to this site each weekday and spends almost none ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVES Perhaps you want to read all of One Foot Tsunami, since day one. Since OFT has a single post per weekday, it’s actually possible to read the whole thing. If you’re up for it, thank you, that’s quite the compliment. To read it all, start at the very first post from way back

in

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Thursday, May 13th, 2021. Yesterday, the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2021 class. I was pleased to see that one of my favorite bands, Foo Fighters, is getting the call. Curious who else is getting inducted? Why, none other than famous rock and roll legend Jay-Z, of

course.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A NICE FAMILY OUTING The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A RETROSPECTIVE OF THE RAID THAT GOT BIN The beginning of this month marked a full decade since the death of Osama Bin Laden, and Politico put together a remarkable retrospective of the time before and after the raid, from the people who were involved. It’s a long and worthwhile read. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: WE THE PIKACHUS OF CHILE, IN ORDER TO Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: The Bell Tolls for Glen. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: IMPRESSIVE CLOSING SPEED Impressive Closing Speed. ∞. Recently in Utah, a dog named Holly managed to take part in a high school relay race. She was astonishingly fast. Holly ran the final 100 meters of the race in about 10.5 seconds. That’s only about 1 second behind Usain Bolt’s world-record mark from the 2009 World Championships. It was all

captured on video

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: CAPITAL ONE’S PHOTOSHOP DISASTER The first is that Capital One is using a photograph of Samuel L. Jackson which a clumsy designer has digitally manipulated almost beyond recognition. The second is that Capital One photographed a guy who looks very much like a younger Samuel L. Jackson, even though they have access to the real thing. Honestly, I’m not sure which would be

worse.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Wednesday, June 2nd, 2021. You’re a trendsetter, an influencer, a real groundbreaker. Now thanks to CVS, when you protect yourself against COVID-19 by getting vaccinated, you’ll also have the chance to win a “pleasure” cruise. Catch the next pandemic before it gets

popular.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: AN UNEXPECTED CONSEQUENCE OF BITCOIN Yesterday, I saw the following news summary: DOJ recovers most of Colonial Pipeline ransom The Justice Department announced Monday that

it

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Thursday, May 13th, 2021. Yesterday, the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2021 class. I was pleased to see that one of my favorite bands, Foo Fighters, is getting the call. Curious who else is getting inducted? Why, none other than famous rock and roll legend Jay-Z, of

course.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Don’t Do Cicadas ∞. Don’t Do Cicadas. ∞. Saturday, May 22nd, 2021. Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline: Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus That Makes Their Butts Fall Off. Well, that’s horrifying. It seems the fungus replaces the ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: WE THE PIKACHUS OF CHILE, IN ORDER TO Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: The Bell Tolls for Glen. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: USPS’S NEW “PREMIUM” TRACKINGSEE MORE ON

ONEFOOTTSUNAMI.COM

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Wednesday, June 2nd, 2021. You’re a trendsetter, an influencer, a real groundbreaker. Now thanks to CVS, when you protect yourself against COVID-19 by getting vaccinated, you’ll also have the chance to win a “pleasure” cruise. Catch the next pandemic before it gets

popular.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: AN UNEXPECTED CONSEQUENCE OF BITCOIN Yesterday, I saw the following news summary: DOJ recovers most of Colonial Pipeline ransom The Justice Department announced Monday that

it

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Thursday, May 13th, 2021. Yesterday, the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2021 class. I was pleased to see that one of my favorite bands, Foo Fighters, is getting the call. Curious who else is getting inducted? Why, none other than famous rock and roll legend Jay-Z, of

course.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Don’t Do Cicadas ∞. Don’t Do Cicadas. ∞. Saturday, May 22nd, 2021. Cicadas are everywhere right now, both in much of nature and in the news. Recently, I saw an article with this headline: Cicadas Fall Prey to a Psychedelic-Producing Fungus That Makes Their Butts Fall Off. Well, that’s horrifying. It seems the fungus replaces the ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: WE THE PIKACHUS OF CHILE, IN ORDER TO Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: The Bell Tolls for Glen. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: USPS’S NEW “PREMIUM” TRACKINGSEE MORE ON

ONEFOOTTSUNAMI.COM

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FEATURES Tuesday, June 1st, 2021. Back in 1998, advice columnist Abigail Van Buren took a letter from a woman who was deeply upset about her husband urinating in their front yard. Her response was, frankly, not terribly helpful. This is not a subject that’s often discussed, but I suspect the practice is not unusual. Dogs and cats urinate to mark

their

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVES Perhaps you want to read all of One Foot Tsunami, since day one. Since OFT has a single post per weekday, it’s actually possible to read the whole thing. If you’re up for it, thank you, that’s quite the compliment. To read it all, start at the very first post from way back

in

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: RUNNING In miserable rainy weather, American Desiree Linden took the women’s crown in the 122nd running of the Boston Marathon yesterday.It was the first Boston victory by an American woman in 33 years, and it was a hell of a run. In a post-race interview, Linden stated that early on in the run, she felt it likely

she would drop out.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A NICE FAMILY OUTING The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Early this morning, I awoke to news that the CDC and FDA are recommending a pause on all vaccinations using the Johnson & Johnson COVID-19 vaccine. This is very bad news, though not because of a problem with the vaccine itself. The issue at hand, “severe blood clots”, seems to be vanishingly rare. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Homemade Hooch and Atomic Attack Instructions ∞. Monday, February 8th, 2021. Some time in the late ’60s, Navy meteorologist Paul Grisham lost his wallet in Antarctica, at the Ross Island research station. Now, more than five decades later, it’s been returned to him. Grisham’s Navy ID, his driver’s license, a tax withholding

statement

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: IMPRESSIVE CLOSING SPEED Impressive Closing Speed. ∞. Recently in Utah, a dog named Holly managed to take part in a high school relay race. She was astonishingly fast. Holly ran the final 100 meters of the race in about 10.5 seconds. That’s only about 1 second behind Usain Bolt’s world-record mark from the 2009 World Championships. It was all

captured on video

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A COLLECTION OF CUTIES Rudolph Cutie. This was the first of three stickers which were all appropriate for the Christmas season. Of course, if you take a look, you’ll see that Cuties don’t appear to have noses. As such, it seems as likely as not that “Rudolph Cutie” here actually has a giant, disgusting cyst. Barvd! ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: STOPSIGN: PLEASE STOP NEVER STOPPING Tuesday, March 23rd, 2021. Thanks to an email from friend-of-the-site Ben T., I spent a few minutes today watching a live stream of a stop sign in Salem, MA. Thousands of other people did too. If you want a perfect demonstration of just how bad Massachusetts drivers really are, tune in to this ridiculous live stream right here. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Tuesday, May 18th, 2021. A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé: ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: INGENUITY FLIES Monday, April 19th, 2021. Over on the red planet, NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter has slipped the surly bonds of Mars. Look at what we can do. Previously in humanity flying on other worlds: First in Flight,

Twice Over.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Thursday, May 13th, 2021. Yesterday, the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2021 class. I was pleased to see that one of my favorite bands, Foo Fighters, is getting the call. Curious who else is getting inducted? Why, none other than famous rock and roll legend Jay-Z, of

course.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Stop Being Sexist, Siri. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: WE THE PIKACHUS OF CHILE, IN ORDER TO Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: The Bell Tolls for Glen. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: KFC SEARCH RESULTS Kentucky Fried Creepers. Friday, March 4th, 2016. Recently, comedian Jim Gaffigan started appearing in KFC commercials as the newest iteration of the Colonel. After seeing one of these ads during the Super Bowl, I tweeted a joke: Come on, the man has a book called “ Food: A Love Story ”. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Tuesday, May 18th, 2021. A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé: ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: INGENUITY FLIES Monday, April 19th, 2021. Over on the red planet, NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter has slipped the surly bonds of Mars. Look at what we can do. Previously in humanity flying on other worlds: First in Flight,

Twice Over.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Thursday, May 13th, 2021. Yesterday, the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2021 class. I was pleased to see that one of my favorite bands, Foo Fighters, is getting the call. Curious who else is getting inducted? Why, none other than famous rock and roll legend Jay-Z, of

course.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Stop Being Sexist, Siri. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: WE THE PIKACHUS OF CHILE, IN ORDER TO Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: The Bell Tolls for Glen. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ENCOUNTERING AN ESPLANADE EAGLE Encountering an Esplanade Eagle. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: KFC SEARCH RESULTS Kentucky Fried Creepers. Friday, March 4th, 2016. Recently, comedian Jim Gaffigan started appearing in KFC commercials as the newest iteration of the Colonel. After seeing one of these ads during the Super Bowl, I tweeted a joke: Come on, the man has a book called “ Food: A Love Story ”. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FEATURES Tuesday, June 1st, 2021. Back in 1998, advice columnist Abigail Van Buren took a letter from a woman who was deeply upset about her husband urinating in their front yard. Her response was, frankly, not terribly helpful. This is not a subject that’s often discussed, but I suspect the practice is not unusual. Dogs and cats urinate to mark

their

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THE ONE FOOT TSUNAMI ARCHIVES Perhaps you want to read all of One Foot Tsunami, since day one. Since OFT has a single post per weekday, it’s actually possible to read the whole thing. If you’re up for it, thank you, that’s quite the compliment. To read it all, start at the very first post from way back

in

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: RUNNING In miserable rainy weather, American Desiree Linden took the women’s crown in the 122nd running of the Boston Marathon yesterday.It was the first Boston victory by an American woman in 33 years, and it was a hell of a run. In a post-race interview, Linden stated that early on in the run, she felt it likely

she would drop out.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A NICE FAMILY OUTING The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Early this morning, I awoke to news that the CDC and FDA are recommending a pause on all vaccinations using the Johnson & Johnson COVID-19 vaccine. This is very bad news, though not because of a problem with the vaccine itself. The issue at hand, “severe blood clots”, seems to be vanishingly rare. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Homemade Hooch and Atomic Attack Instructions ∞. Monday, February 8th, 2021. Some time in the late ’60s, Navy meteorologist Paul Grisham lost his wallet in Antarctica, at the Ross Island research station. Now, more than five decades later, it’s been returned to him. Grisham’s Navy ID, his driver’s license, a tax withholding

statement

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A COLLECTION OF CUTIES Rudolph Cutie. This was the first of three stickers which were all appropriate for the Christmas season. Of course, if you take a look, you’ll see that Cuties don’t appear to have noses. As such, it seems as likely as not that “Rudolph Cutie” here actually has a giant, disgusting cyst. Barvd! ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: IMPRESSIVE CLOSING SPEED Impressive Closing Speed. ∞. Recently in Utah, a dog named Holly managed to take part in a high school relay race. She was astonishingly fast. Holly ran the final 100 meters of the race in about 10.5 seconds. That’s only about 1 second behind Usain Bolt’s world-record mark from the 2009 World Championships. It was all

captured on video

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: STOPSIGN: PLEASE STOP NEVER STOPPING Tuesday, March 23rd, 2021. Thanks to an email from friend-of-the-site Ben T., I spent a few minutes today watching a live stream of a stop sign in Salem, MA. Thousands of other people did too. If you want a perfect demonstration of just how bad Massachusetts drivers really are, tune in to this ridiculous live stream right here. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Tuesday, May 18th, 2021. A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé: ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ABOUT One Foot Tsunami consists of humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Paul would love to thank you for reading One Foot Tsunami, but he’s too busy writing great new content for you (yes, you).Paul publishes one new post to this site each weekday and spends almost none ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: INGENUITY FLIES Monday, April 19th, 2021. Over on the red planet, NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter has slipped the surly bonds of Mars. Look at what we can do. Previously in humanity flying on other worlds: First in Flight,

Twice Over.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PLATELET SEARCH RESULTS Thursday, April 29th, 2021. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FUN WITH CHECKS Unfortunately, despite the fact that the internet exists, checks remain a relevant tool in the 21st century. Given that, we may as well at least have some fun with them. Fans of my on-an-extremely-long-hiatus podcast “ Just The Tip ” 1 may remember that my co-host Amy has some amazing personal checks. We call them pizza checks: It’s just ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: KFC SEARCH RESULTS Kentucky Fried Creepers. Friday, March 4th, 2016. Recently, comedian Jim Gaffigan started appearing in KFC commercials as the newest iteration of the Colonel. After seeing one of these ads during the Super Bowl, I tweeted a joke: Come on, the man has a book called “ Food: A Love Story ”. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Scientists in Sweden have just published a study showing untrained wolf pups can fetch a ball, like a domesticated dog.. This is the first evidence, reported Thursday in iScience, of this kind of responsiveness in untrained wolves, Dr. Hansen Wheat said. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Tuesday, May 18th, 2021. A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé: ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ABOUT One Foot Tsunami consists of humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Paul would love to thank you for reading One Foot Tsunami, but he’s too busy writing great new content for you (yes, you).Paul publishes one new post to this site each weekday and spends almost none ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: INGENUITY FLIES Monday, April 19th, 2021. Over on the red planet, NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter has slipped the surly bonds of Mars. Look at what we can do. Previously in humanity flying on other worlds: First in Flight,

Twice Over.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PLATELET SEARCH RESULTS Thursday, April 29th, 2021. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FUN WITH CHECKS Unfortunately, despite the fact that the internet exists, checks remain a relevant tool in the 21st century. Given that, we may as well at least have some fun with them. Fans of my on-an-extremely-long-hiatus podcast “ Just The Tip ” 1 may remember that my co-host Amy has some amazing personal checks. We call them pizza checks: It’s just ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: KFC SEARCH RESULTS Kentucky Fried Creepers. Friday, March 4th, 2016. Recently, comedian Jim Gaffigan started appearing in KFC commercials as the newest iteration of the Colonel. After seeing one of these ads during the Super Bowl, I tweeted a joke: Come on, the man has a book called “ Food: A Love Story ”. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Scientists in Sweden have just published a study showing untrained wolf pups can fetch a ball, like a domesticated dog.. This is the first evidence, reported Thursday in iScience, of this kind of responsiveness in untrained wolves, Dr. Hansen Wheat said. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: RUNNING In miserable rainy weather, American Desiree Linden took the women’s crown in the 122nd running of the Boston Marathon yesterday.It was the first Boston victory by an American woman in 33 years, and it was a hell of a run. In a post-race interview, Linden stated that early on in the run, she felt it likely

she would drop out.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A MAGIC SHOW FOR BIRDS Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Strength in the Face of Evil. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A NICE FAMILY OUTING The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: LAND SHRIMP Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Meet the Resistance. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: INGENUITY FLIES Monday, April 19th, 2021. Over on the red planet, NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter has slipped the surly bonds of Mars. Look at what we can do. Previously in humanity flying on other worlds: First in Flight,

Twice Over.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé:. Yours is a pathetic situation, and all of my sympathy is with you. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Thursday, May 13th, 2021. Yesterday, the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2021 class. I was pleased to see that one of my favorite bands, Foo Fighters, is getting the call. Curious who else is getting inducted? Why, none other than famous rock and roll legend Jay-Z, of

course.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Stop Being Sexist, Siri. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: IMPRESSIVE CLOSING SPEED Impressive Closing Speed. ∞. Recently in Utah, a dog named Holly managed to take part in a high school relay race. She was astonishingly fast. Holly ran the final 100 meters of the race in about 10.5 seconds. That’s only about 1 second behind Usain Bolt’s world-record mark from the 2009 World Championships. It was all

captured on video

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Tuesday, May 18th, 2021. A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé: ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ABOUT One Foot Tsunami consists of humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Paul would love to thank you for reading One Foot Tsunami, but he’s too busy writing great new content for you (yes, you).Paul publishes one new post to this site each weekday and spends almost none ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: INGENUITY FLIES Monday, April 19th, 2021. Over on the red planet, NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter has slipped the surly bonds of Mars. Look at what we can do. Previously in humanity flying on other worlds: First in Flight,

Twice Over.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PLATELET SEARCH RESULTS Thursday, April 29th, 2021. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FUN WITH CHECKS Unfortunately, despite the fact that the internet exists, checks remain a relevant tool in the 21st century. Given that, we may as well at least have some fun with them. Fans of my on-an-extremely-long-hiatus podcast “ Just The Tip ” 1 may remember that my co-host Amy has some amazing personal checks. We call them pizza checks: It’s just ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: KFC SEARCH RESULTS Kentucky Fried Creepers. Friday, March 4th, 2016. Recently, comedian Jim Gaffigan started appearing in KFC commercials as the newest iteration of the Colonel. After seeing one of these ads during the Super Bowl, I tweeted a joke: Come on, the man has a book called “ Food: A Love Story ”. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Scientists in Sweden have just published a study showing untrained wolf pups can fetch a ball, like a domesticated dog.. This is the first evidence, reported Thursday in iScience, of this kind of responsiveness in untrained wolves, Dr. Hansen Wheat said. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Tuesday, May 18th, 2021. A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé: ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ABOUT One Foot Tsunami consists of humor writing by Paul Kafasis. Paul would love to thank you for reading One Foot Tsunami, but he’s too busy writing great new content for you (yes, you).Paul publishes one new post to this site each weekday and spends almost none ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF AVAILABLE NUMBERS There’s No Shortage of Available Numbers. Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, I’ve been amused by the various phases governments throughout the US have used for their re-opening plans. In Massachusetts, the whole thing is an overcomplicated mess, with steps within phases. Fortunately, by staying home as much as possible, I’m

able to avoid

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: INGENUITY FLIES Monday, April 19th, 2021. Over on the red planet, NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter has slipped the surly bonds of Mars. Look at what we can do. Previously in humanity flying on other worlds: First in Flight,

Twice Over.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: VISUALIZING THE RISK-REWARD CALCULUS OF It discusses an assortment of numbers and statistics, and also offers a decent visualization of our current understanding of the risk-reward calculus for the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. Nearly everything we do is a balance between risk and reward. Driving down the street, as mentioned above. Walking outside, where a meteorite could suddenly

slam

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DO LESS HARM Meanwhile, more than 560,000 Americans have lost their lives to COVID already, with 330 more being killed by COVID every few hours. Human beings are horrifically bad at understanding large numbers and terrible at assessing broad risks. Public health officials ought to take that reality into consideration before making a move like this. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: PLATELET SEARCH RESULTS Thursday, April 29th, 2021. While biking to a platelet donation this morning, I spotted a large mass in a tree. Right near the Harvard Bridge a.k.a. the MIT Bridge a.k.a. the Mass Ave Bridge a.k.a. the Smoot bridge, on Boston’s Charles River Esplanade. As followers of my Instagram account know, I am an extremely amateur birdwatcher. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: FUN WITH CHECKS Unfortunately, despite the fact that the internet exists, checks remain a relevant tool in the 21st century. Given that, we may as well at least have some fun with them. Fans of my on-an-extremely-long-hiatus podcast “ Just The Tip ” 1 may remember that my co-host Amy has some amazing personal checks. We call them pizza checks: It’s just ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: KFC SEARCH RESULTS Kentucky Fried Creepers. Friday, March 4th, 2016. Recently, comedian Jim Gaffigan started appearing in KFC commercials as the newest iteration of the Colonel. After seeing one of these ads during the Super Bowl, I tweeted a joke: Come on, the man has a book called “ Food: A Love Story ”. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS Scientists in Sweden have just published a study showing untrained wolf pups can fetch a ball, like a domesticated dog.. This is the first evidence, reported Thursday in iScience, of this kind of responsiveness in untrained wolves, Dr. Hansen Wheat said. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: RUNNING In miserable rainy weather, American Desiree Linden took the women’s crown in the 122nd running of the Boston Marathon yesterday.It was the first Boston victory by an American woman in 33 years, and it was a hell of a run. In a post-race interview, Linden stated that early on in the run, she felt it likely

she would drop out.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A MAGIC SHOW FOR BIRDS Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Strength in the Face of Evil. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A NICE FAMILY OUTING The existence of billionaires is problematic, and it’s reasonable to wonder if our society should allow them to exist at all. The fact that Jeff Bezos is reportedly spending $500 million on a yacht that’s so big it needs its own support yacht is both obscene and disgusting. It’s also an incredibly powerful argument for stronger wealth

redistribution.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: LAND SHRIMP Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Meet the Resistance. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: INGENUITY FLIES Monday, April 19th, 2021. Over on the red planet, NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter has slipped the surly bonds of Mars. Look at what we can do. Previously in humanity flying on other worlds: First in Flight,

Twice Over.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI BY PAUL KAFASIS A century back, “Princess Mysteria” wrote as an unusually modern kind of advice columnist. Recently, Slate took a look at some of her old letters and responses, such as this answer to a woman who had lost her legs in an accident and was now dealing with a drunken fiancé:. Yours is a pathetic situation, and all of my sympathy is with you. ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: A FRONT ROW SEAT FOR THE CONFLAGRATION A Front Row Seat for the Conflagration. ∞. Monday, May 3rd, 2021. Down in Maryland, a woman is being accused of attempted murder, after setting her home on fire with someone else inside. That’s terrible, of course. However: Witnesses told investigators that Gail J. Metwally, 47, set multiple fires in the home and then watched from a

chair

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: ROCK, ROLL, AND BEYOND Thursday, May 13th, 2021. Yesterday, the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its 2021 class. I was pleased to see that one of my favorite bands, Foo Fighters, is getting the call. Curious who else is getting inducted? Why, none other than famous rock and roll legend Jay-Z, of

course.

ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: DON’T DO CICADAS Best of One Foot Tsunami. Read a random selection from OFT's very best posts: Stop Being Sexist, Siri. Check out the full Best Of archive.. Tune in to Just The Tip. Hear Paul and his good friend Amy Jane Gruber on their mildly-popular Just The Tip comedy podcast.. Love The Site? ONE FOOT TSUNAMI: IMPRESSIVE CLOSING SPEED Impressive Closing Speed. ∞. Recently in Utah, a dog named Holly managed to take part in a high school relay race. She was astonishingly fast. Holly ran the final 100 meters of the race in about 10.5 seconds. That’s only about 1 second behind Usain Bolt’s world-record mark from the 2009 World Championships. It was all

captured on video

------------------------- DONALD TRUMP IS BORED

∞

FRIDAY, MAY 8TH, 2020 It’s natural to try to understand just what those in power are thinking and planning for America, as we continue to grapple with the COVID-19 pandemic. Far too often in the past few weeks, the federal government has utterly failed in its duties to coordinate a national response. Often, it has seemed that the plan is to have no plan

.

However, even that requires a level of foresight that doesn’t seem to reflect the reality of who Donald Trump is. Instead, consider this quote, from Amanda Marcotte: > It’s tempting to imagine that Trump is motivated by some clever > political strategy — or by any strategy at all — in making this > move now. But it’s probably just that he’s getting bored with > this whole coronavirus crisis and, now that things are getting > really hard, he’s ready to abandon it and move on. That’s > exactly what he did during his entire career in the real estate > business — and in his marriages — abandoning one failed venture > after another the second things turned rocky. Now he’s doing it to > the entire country. Marcotte’s piece for Salon is the most cogent read I’ve yet seen. CORONAVIRUS DIARIES: VIRTUAL PLUMBER VISITS

∞

THURSDAY, MAY 7TH, 2020 Since late February, Slate has been running a series called “Coronavirus Diaries ”, which they explain as “dispatches exploring how the coronavirus is affecting people’s lives”. It’s an eclectic mix of stories, offering interesting perspectives you might not otherwise here. Recently, plumber Patrick Garner explained how the plumbing business he works for has adapted, in a piece entitled “I’m Staring Into People’s Toilets on Zoom

All Day

”.

LOOK AT ME. LOOK AT ME. WEDNESDAY, MAY 6TH, 2020 Yesterday, I received a flurry of emails from various charities to which I’ve donated. They all wanted me to be aware of a new global day of altruism created in response to the COVID-19 outbreak: #GivingTuesdayNow . The name’s a bit clunky, and I’m not sure if you pronounce the hashtag, but it’s a worthy idea. However, multiple emails I received used a subject line I found rather

aggressive:

*

Today is #GivingTuesdayNOW! Between the phrasing and the emphasis, it’s like they’ve commandeered the “holiday”, and they’re that guy in “Captain

Phillips ”

who tells Tom Hanks “I’m the captain now

”.

Anyway, I hope you had a very merry #GivingTuesdayNow yesterday. If we’re going to make a hash of the calendar with repeated Black Fridays and the like, it’s good that we can at least double up on giving

back too.

LEAN INTO THAT NAME

TUESDAY, MAY 5TH, 2020 I recently received a fairly unnecessary email from American Airlines, detailing their new safety procedures for travelers. However, despite the fact that I have no plans to fly in the near future, this text caught my eye:

*

Kurt Stache, American’s Senior Vice President of Customer Experience, talks about our new requirement for wearing masks in

flight…

As did this image:

It was difficult to be sure of what I was seeing with that massive play icon obstructing things, so I clicked to watch the video

. Here’s a still:

Alas, my fears were confirmed. American Airlines Senior Vice President of Customer Experience Kurt Stache has no mustache. Kurt, what are you doing with yourself? How do you _not_ grow yourself a nose neighbor? You can’t be just out there living life looking like a nerdier Joe Buck, while you’ve got a phenomenal name like “Kurt Stache” at your disposal: L: Joe Buck; R: Kurt Stache No, you have to lean into that kind of name. Embrace it! Go Rollie

Fingers with it:

Or Groucho Marx !1

You’ve got the eyebrows for it: Give us something, man! -------------------------

Footnotes:

*

Did you know Groucho Marx’s mustache was fake? I did not! I’ve never seen his films, so I’m perhaps mostly familiar with him via novelty Groucho glasses: Now of course those are fake, but the eyebrows and mustache are quite bushy. And yet, in his vaudeville days and in most of his movies, Marx used simple lines of grease paint. Once you really look, it’s

obvious:

I was so blind. Even more confusing, in his later years, Marx grew a real mustache. ↩︎ COUNTING FLU DEATHS PROPERLY

∞

MONDAY, MAY 4TH, 2020 As of today, the tally of COVID-19 deaths in America sits around 70,000. That’s an awfully high number, but there are still many misguided people who believe the reaction has all been overblown, and that this virus is no worse than the flu. A major cause of that incorrect thinking is how flu deaths are counted, an issue Dr. Jeremy Samuel Faust is working to correct

:

> If we compare, for instance, the number of people who died in the > United States from COVID-19 in the second full week of April to the > number of people who died from influenza during the worst week of > the past seven flu seasons (as reported to the CDC), we find that > the novel coronavirus killed between 9.5 and 44 times more people > than seasonal flu. In other words, the coronavirus is not anything > like the flu: It is much, much worse. Even with the incredible restrictions we’re experiencing during quarantine, COVID-19 is killing many, many more people than the

seasonal flu.

PROTECTING WHAT’S IMPORTANT FRIDAY, MAY 1ST, 2020 As discussed last week, our inboxes are being deluged with COVID-19

related emails

.

From financial institutions telling me all about the marvels of online banking to hotels I haven’t stayed at in years assuring me they’ve got a room for me, every company I’ve ever even looked at wants to let me know that we’re all in this together. Behind each of these emails, there’s a tremendously misguided marketer responsible for sending it. I like to picture them sitting, sweating, terrified at the idea of a customer one day thinking “Hey! I just realized LensCrafters never checked in on me during the pandemic! Those insensitive jerks!”. Since mid-March, I’ve been running an informal contest to find the absolute most ridiculous emails sent in relation to COVID-19. I’ve spotted some good ones myself, and friends have provided more. Most recently, friend-of-the-site Quentin C. submitted a real doozy. The subject gets us off to a great start: “Protecting Logs and Lumber in

Uncertain Times”.

Oo, tell me more, UC Coatings LLC! They certainly checked all the boxes, including mentioning “these uncertain times” and letting us know they’re “here” for us. I’m not sure if they’re just letting me know they’re open, or also informing me that I can call them and sob if I need to. I mean, they don’t say I can’t. It’s difficult for me to imagine the mindset of someone who thinks “We need to remind people to protect their logs!” in the midst of all this. But even if that were necessary, skip the lead-in. Just vaguely mention the economic slowdown, and this would be a lot less tacky. And as for being “here for me”? You’re not here for me! You’re there, for yourselves, to earn money. That’s fine – you’re a business! You can just say “we’re open”. Have you seen your own amusingly needless email? I invite you to submit your own nomination for “Most Superfluous COVID-19 Email”. Good luck beating “wood protection products” though.

DON’T BE A PENCE

THURSDAY, APRIL 30TH, 2020 It’s been several weeks since I wrote about how we should all wear a

mask

when going out in public. Hopefully by this point, you’re on board. Just in case you still need convincing, this article from the Atlantic lays things out with wonderful clarity. Put simply, your mask helps me, my mask helps you, and when enough people wear masks, the spread of COVID-19 is drastically reduced. Wearing a mask is a simple and effective action we can all take to help move the world back to something closer to normal. Frankly, if I see someone’s nose and mouth out in public right now, I consider them a rude and selfish. Wearing a mask should be viewed as an act of patriotism, as taking part in a collective effort akin to rationing or buying bonds during wartime. Refusing to wear a mask isn’t brave, it’s practically treasonous. Nevertheless, there are still many people who have yet to see the light. Most egregious among them is Vice President Mike Pence, who toured the Mayo Clinic on Tuesday with his maw on full display

.

This occurred despite an established policy that _all_ visitors must

mask up.

It’s disappointing that the medical experts at the Mayo even allowed Pence to enter the premises. Even more cravenly, their Twitter account

first tweeted

confirmation that Pence had been informed of the policy before his arrival, then later deleted the tweet. At this point, no one’s coming out of this looking good. But hey, just to be fair, let’s see how Pence defended his actions

:

> “As vice president of the United States, I’m tested for the > coronavirus on a regular basis, and everyone who is around me is > tested for the coronavirus,” he told reporters, saying he is > following Centers for Disease Control and Prevention guidelines.

>

> “And since I don’t have the coronavirus, I thought it’d be a > good opportunity for me to be here, to be able to speak to these > researchers, these incredible health care personnel, and look them > in the eye and say ‘thank you.’ “ No test is going to be perfect, and even if the results are extremely reliable, they’re also sure to be a lagging indicator. At the very least, despite what he’s saying, it’s impossible for Pence to be certain he doesn’t have the virus. When interacting with frontline medical workers, staff, and sick patients, it’s inexcusable to fail to exercise caution and follow policy, no matter how recently he received an all-clear test. Even if Pence actually could be certain there was no chance he’d spread the virus, his decision not to wear a mask was also a failure of leadership. Good leaders know how to lead by example. In 1969, Fred Rogers shared a foot bath with a black man to promote racial equality at a time when swimming pools in America were often still segregated. To teach the world that HIV couldn’t be transmitted by touch, Princess Diana shook the hand of an AIDS patient

on

television. But Mike Pence? He shrank from the opportunity to set a

good example.

Hang on, though. Let’s re-read part of that feeble defense: > I thought it’d be a good opportunity for me to…look them in the > eye and say ‘thank you.’ “ Does Mike Pence not know the difference between a mask and a

blindfold?

NEXT I’LL BE SHILLING FLAT TUMMY TEA WEDNESDAY, APRIL 29TH, 2020 Recently, a photo of myself I’d posted to Instagram garnered a rather strange comment: Weeks after I’d initially posted the picture, the folks from “@pierrearden_team_snowp” crept in to say:

*

Hey Paul, we’re really into your fashion and would like to organize a collab. Msg our main account @pierrearden_ and let them know we sent

you!

They weren’t specific, so it’s difficult to guess what part of “my fashion” they like. Is it my Goodr sunglasses (Hey-oh

, look

who’s influencing now!)? The unbranded t-shirt and hoodie? Perhaps it’s that unfortunate pimple on my chin. Whatever had caught @pierrearden_team_snowp’s eye, I knew I had to get aboard this gravy train, and fast. I was ticketed for the social media big leagues. I was going to “collab” with “@pierrearden_”, whoever the heck that was, on their “main

account”!

Never mind that my Instagram account has just 1,000 followers, a number which is surely much too small to be worth, well, anything. I decided to take one for my readers, and see just what the scheme here was. Checking in on @pierrearden_, I learned it was a watch company with around 60,000 followers. Against my better judgement, I messaged them the following:

*

Your @pierrearden_team_snowp account it “really into my fashion”, and want to “organize a collab”, so they told me to message here.

I am…intrigued.

Hey, it was truthful. I was indeed intrigued by what the scam might be. In just a few minutes, they replied:

*

Hey Paul!

We have been reaching out to a few people who fit our style for a potential collaboration. We don’t usually do this, but we want to offer you 50% off everything in our store, so that you can wear the latest timepieces. All we ask, is that you tag us in a picture of you wearing it and we will feature you on our page. Would this interest you?🙌 Nothing against these particular watches, but this offer would have been unappealing to me even if they were going to send me one for free. My response was brief, dismissive, and admittedly slightly rude:

*

Oh, ha. No, it would not. Their social media handler could not be flapped, however, and even made a second attempt to get a sale:

*

No worries, we understand. And thank you so much for dropping by. We would love you to be on our team in the future! You can always get back to us and please feel free to look around. Have an amazing day! Here is a 25% off discount code for taking some of you time

Code: THANKYOU25

I’m not sure a 25% coupon makes much sense when I was just offered 50% off, but perhaps they thought I’d share it. You may notice that I’ve opted not to even link to this company directly, and I’ve blacked the coupon code out. If you really want it, you can highlight the text to reveal it, though I suspect you could also just message them to request in on that 50% discount that they “don’t usually

do”.

Of course, maybe they really did want me. If this was my one shot to break into the glamorous world of male modeling, I guess I blew it. BE A GOODR INFLUENCER TUESDAY, APRIL 28TH, 2020 Speaking of influencers

,

discount sunglass maker Goodr is appealing to influencers in their own unique way. At $25 a pair for quality polarized sunglasses, the company probably doesn’t have a ton of advertising cash to waste. Instead, Goodr is laying the disdain on thick, with an email campaign entitled “Influencers Welcome….to Pay Double”: From the very real optional doubled pricing

to a very

sarcastic post on their site , it’s clear Goodr is no fan of influencer culture. THE INFLUENCER CRASH  ∞ MONDAY, APRIL 27TH, 2020 As you may already know, “influencers

” are people with

large followings on social media who receive payment for pitching various products. It’s generally a rather gross culture, but due to the COVID-19 pandemic, it appears to be falling apart

.

> For luxury influencers like Israel, it’s an opportunity to reflect > on his industry.

>

> “I’m trying to be very real at the moment,” he says, adding > that he won’t buy any more Hermes bags this year. In these uncertain times, we all have to make sacrifices.

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