CHASING QUERENCIA

Photo by Allef Vinicius It was almost midnight on the 9th of June when I was first initiated into the club. It was a hot summer night and I remember vividly the dress I was wearing. ABOUT CHASING QUERENCIA Querencia is a Spanish term for that inner place from which to draw strength. It captures that feeling within that we strive to hold on to in times of struggle, or as we grow and learn about ourselves and our limits. Querencia is that voice inside that tells us to keep going, to

push through.

CHASING QUERENCIA

when i was 30 my father, 56, passed away suddenly from a brain tumor he was diagnosed with only 6 weeks before. this is the eulogy i read

at his funeral.

GRIEF IS…

Grief is when the weight of missing someone sits on your chest, all 6000 pounds of it. Grief is crying so hard you can’t tell if you need a Kleenex for your eyes, your nose or your mouth. Grief is a flood of feelings that blocks out all reason and stops the moment;

“where are

THE MIGRATION

Photo by Dave Meier Tomorrow was the day of the Migration. He double-checked his list. The supplies were packed and ready, everyone had been fed and was now waiting in the departure wing, the buses were set to arrive at 6 am sharp. Everything was GROWTH – CHASING QUERENCIA Posts about growth written by Chasing Querencia. WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. SLEEP JUST STARTED A REVOLUTION Photo by Sander Smeekes Sleep is one of the greater mysteries in the human experience. It’s also the tie that binds. There is equality in sleep, like death, escaping none of us. We all know the suffocating pull of being tired, and we have all universally closed our eyes in DAD – CHASING QUERENCIA Posts about dad written by Chasing Querencia. Hey dad, it’s been a really long time. It hurts very much to open up that part of my mind and soul that’s missing you and acknowledge how much I’m still hurting and everything we’ve lost. THROUGH THE MANY HIDDEN FACES Photo by Nathan Anderson Her hand was outstretched in front of her as another person brushed passed. She could feel the winter air they brought from outside as they wisked by. Her cheeks were cold and her eyes tired. Only three more hours and sixteen minutes until her shift was over. Three hours and fifteen LONG HUGS AND LEATHER BOOTS WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. THIS IS A LETTER TO MY FATHER. July 6, 2018 Hi dad. Sorry it’s been so long, it’s been a busy few weeks. I got the keys to the new apartment on June

CHASING QUERENCIA

Photo by Allef Vinicius It was almost midnight on the 9th of June when I was first initiated into the club. It was a hot summer night and I remember vividly the dress I was wearing. ABOUT CHASING QUERENCIA Querencia is a Spanish term for that inner place from which to draw strength. It captures that feeling within that we strive to hold on to in times of struggle, or as we grow and learn about ourselves and our limits. Querencia is that voice inside that tells us to keep going, to

push through.

CHASING QUERENCIA

when i was 30 my father, 56, passed away suddenly from a brain tumor he was diagnosed with only 6 weeks before. this is the eulogy i read

at his funeral.

GRIEF IS…

Grief is when the weight of missing someone sits on your chest, all 6000 pounds of it. Grief is crying so hard you can’t tell if you need a Kleenex for your eyes, your nose or your mouth. Grief is a flood of feelings that blocks out all reason and stops the moment;

“where are

THE MIGRATION

Photo by Dave Meier Tomorrow was the day of the Migration. He double-checked his list. The supplies were packed and ready, everyone had been fed and was now waiting in the departure wing, the buses were set to arrive at 6 am sharp. Everything was GROWTH – CHASING QUERENCIA Posts about growth written by Chasing Querencia. WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. SLEEP JUST STARTED A REVOLUTION Photo by Sander Smeekes Sleep is one of the greater mysteries in the human experience. It’s also the tie that binds. There is equality in sleep, like death, escaping none of us. We all know the suffocating pull of being tired, and we have all universally closed our eyes in DAD – CHASING QUERENCIA Posts about dad written by Chasing Querencia. Hey dad, it’s been a really long time. It hurts very much to open up that part of my mind and soul that’s missing you and acknowledge how much I’m still hurting and everything we’ve lost. ABOUT CHASING QUERENCIA Querencia is a Spanish term for that inner place from which to draw strength. It captures that feeling within that we strive to hold on to in times of struggle, or as we grow and learn about ourselves and our limits. Querencia is that voice inside that tells us to keep going, to

push through.

WELCOME TO THE CLUB

Photo by Allef Vinicius It was almost midnight on the 9th of June when I was first initiated into the club. It was a hot summer night and I remember vividly the dress I was wearing. Black with floral patterns with a bit of lace at the chest. Had I known that would be the THIS IS THE WORST FEELING WHEN I WAS 30 MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. THIS IS A LETTER I WROTE HIM THE DAY AFTER HE DIED. June 10, 2018 I don’t know where you’ve

gone. I only know I

WONDER – CHASING QUERENCIA I used to think the world was full of magic. I would lie in the sun watching the leaves sway back and forth and think of the breath of giants upon us. I was small then, half the size of my makers. But my imagination was making waves. It washed over the sun and stars. DAY 9 A.D. (AFTER DAD) WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. THIS IS A LETTER TO MY FATHER. June 18, 2018 I found a picture of you from this day last year. I snuck it while you were reading a book. It looks like JULY 2018 – CHASING QUERENCIA 3 posts published by Chasing Querencia during July 2018. WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. DAD – CHASING QUERENCIA Posts about dad written by Chasing Querencia. Hey dad, it’s been a really long time. It hurts very much to open up that part of my mind and soul that’s missing you and acknowledge how much I’m still hurting and everything we’ve lost.

DEAR BONNIE

When you are 5 you will get angry at how he cheats at all the games he plays with you, how he doesn’t tuck you in like mom, or let you sleep in their bed. You will wake up and be reminded that dad is sleeping because he is on evenings, which means he’ll be

HAPPY ST. JEAN DAD

WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. THIS IS A LETTER TO MY FATHER. June 24, 2018 Hey dad. It’s St. Jean Baptiste today. This time last year you were getting ready for your party. I’m sorry I

NOVEMBER 2016

Photo by Dave Meier Tomorrow was the day of the Migration. He double-checked his list. The supplies were packed and ready, everyone had been fed and was now waiting in the departure wing, the buses were set to arrive at 6 am sharp.

CHASING QUERENCIA

Grief is when the weight of missing someone sits on your chest, all 6000 pounds of it. Grief is crying so hard you can’t tell if you need a Kleenex for your eyes, your nose or your mouth. Grief is a flood of feelings that blocks out all reason and stops the moment; “where are. Read More. Grief is. February 23, 2020 Chasing Querencia ABOUT CHASING QUERENCIA Querencia is a Spanish term for that inner place from which to draw strength. It captures that feeling within that we strive to hold on to in times of struggle, or as we grow and learn about ourselves and our limits. Querencia is that voice inside that tells us to keep going, to

push through.

CHASING QUERENCIA

when i was 30 my father, 56, passed away suddenly from a brain tumor he was diagnosed with only 6 weeks before. this is the eulogy i read

at his funeral.

DAD – CHASING QUERENCIA Posts about dad written by Chasing Querencia. Hey dad, it’s been a really long time. It hurts very much to open up that part of my mind and soul that’s missing you and acknowledge how much I’m still hurting and everything we’ve lost.

CHASING QUERENCIA

Photo by Freestocks.org If I could save every woman from one thing it would be the fight she has every day with her own body image. Because that’s what it is: an image.

THE MIGRATION

Photo by Dave Meier Tomorrow was the day of the Migration. He double-checked his list. The supplies were packed and ready, everyone had been fed and was now waiting in the departure wing, the buses were set to arrive at 6 am sharp. Everything was OLD TODAY, YOUNG FOREVER Photo by Cristian Newman It's always surprising when we're confronted with our age. When did we get here? I barely saw those ten thousand days pass by. They all felt so slow, I never would have expected the bulk of them to drift so far away behind me and be whittled down from

the sharp

HOW I LEARNED TO LOVE RUNNING OUTDOORS Photo by Abigail Keenan I started running outdoors four summers ago. I’ve always loved to run but I preferred the treadmill and it’s steady pace. I liked seeing exactly how far I’d gone, my speed and being able to watch my progress. Today I run outdoors with pure

inhibition. I

FALL AND THE COLD WINDS OF CHANGE Photo by Gabby Orcutt I always feel nostalgic in the fall. I think it’s the residual feeling of anticipating the new school year. When the cool winds start to drift in, I think of school supply shopping with my grandparents. If I was lucky, maybe picking out a new pair of running shoes or jeans. LONG HUGS AND LEATHER BOOTS WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. THIS IS A LETTER TO MY FATHER. July 6, 2018 Hi dad. Sorry it’s been so long, it’s been a busy few weeks. I got the keys to the new apartment on June

CHASING QUERENCIA

Grief is when the weight of missing someone sits on your chest, all 6000 pounds of it. Grief is crying so hard you can’t tell if you need a Kleenex for your eyes, your nose or your mouth. Grief is a flood of feelings that blocks out all reason and stops the moment; “where are. Read More. Grief is. February 23, 2020 Chasing Querencia ABOUT CHASING QUERENCIA Querencia is a Spanish term for that inner place from which to draw strength. It captures that feeling within that we strive to hold on to in times of struggle, or as we grow and learn about ourselves and our limits. Querencia is that voice inside that tells us to keep going, to

push through.

CHASING QUERENCIA

when i was 30 my father, 56, passed away suddenly from a brain tumor he was diagnosed with only 6 weeks before. this is the eulogy i read

at his funeral.

DAD – CHASING QUERENCIA Posts about dad written by Chasing Querencia. Hey dad, it’s been a really long time. It hurts very much to open up that part of my mind and soul that’s missing you and acknowledge how much I’m still hurting and everything we’ve lost.

CHASING QUERENCIA

Photo by Freestocks.org If I could save every woman from one thing it would be the fight she has every day with her own body image. Because that’s what it is: an image.

THE MIGRATION

Photo by Dave Meier Tomorrow was the day of the Migration. He double-checked his list. The supplies were packed and ready, everyone had been fed and was now waiting in the departure wing, the buses were set to arrive at 6 am sharp. Everything was OLD TODAY, YOUNG FOREVER Photo by Cristian Newman It's always surprising when we're confronted with our age. When did we get here? I barely saw those ten thousand days pass by. They all felt so slow, I never would have expected the bulk of them to drift so far away behind me and be whittled down from

the sharp

HOW I LEARNED TO LOVE RUNNING OUTDOORS Photo by Abigail Keenan I started running outdoors four summers ago. I’ve always loved to run but I preferred the treadmill and it’s steady pace. I liked seeing exactly how far I’d gone, my speed and being able to watch my progress. Today I run outdoors with pure

inhibition. I

FALL AND THE COLD WINDS OF CHANGE Photo by Gabby Orcutt I always feel nostalgic in the fall. I think it’s the residual feeling of anticipating the new school year. When the cool winds start to drift in, I think of school supply shopping with my grandparents. If I was lucky, maybe picking out a new pair of running shoes or jeans. LONG HUGS AND LEATHER BOOTS WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. THIS IS A LETTER TO MY FATHER. July 6, 2018 Hi dad. Sorry it’s been so long, it’s been a busy few weeks. I got the keys to the new apartment on June

SHORT STORY

Photo by Dave Meier Tomorrow was the day of the Migration. He double-checked his list. The supplies were packed and ready, everyone had been fed and was now waiting in the departure wing, the buses were set to arrive at 6 am sharp. THROUGH THE MANY HIDDEN FACES Photo by Nathan Anderson Her hand was outstretched in front of her as another person brushed passed. She could feel the winter air they brought from outside as they wisked by. Her cheeks were cold and her eyes tired. Only three more hours and sixteen minutes until her shift was over. Three hours and fifteen SLEEP JUST STARTED A REVOLUTION Photo by Sander Smeekes Sleep is one of the greater mysteries in the human experience. It’s also the tie that binds. There is equality in sleep, like death, escaping none of us. We all know the suffocating pull of being tired, and we have all universally closed our eyes in

AUGUST 2016

7 posts published by Chasing Querencia during August 2016. Photo by Luis Llerena I remember reading a post from a psychologist who said one of the most common things people seek help for are issues involving their parents.

FAITH IN HUMANITY

Photo by Annie Spratt When did we find a need to restore our faith in humanity? It feels like there was a collective moment we all exhaled and decided the world was full of monsters. Maybe it's a generational effect caused by the pervasive impact of the world wars FALL AND THE COLD WINDS OF CHANGE Photo by Gabby Orcutt I always feel nostalgic in the fall. I think it’s the residual feeling of anticipating the new school year. When the cool winds start to drift in, I think of school supply shopping with my grandparents. If I was lucky, maybe picking out a new pair of running shoes or jeans. WHY IT’S IMPORTANT TO FAIL IF YOU WANT TO SUCCEED Photo by Chris Hayashi I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how to fail, and after giving it some thought I think I'm going to try it out more often. Failing is defined as a character weakness, in our culture it marks a person’s lowest point. We criticize and judge those who've failed due to HOW TO LOVE YOUR PARENTS Photo by Luis Llerena I remember reading a post from a psychologist who said one of the most common things people seek help for are issues involving their parents. But, surprisingly, it wasn’t the relationships they had with their parents that caused them the most distress, it was the relationships they didn’t have. As kids, HOW I LEARNED TO LOVE RUNNING OUTDOORS Photo by Abigail Keenan I started running outdoors four summers ago. I’ve always loved to run but I preferred the treadmill and it’s steady pace. I liked seeing exactly how far I’d gone, my speed and being able to watch my progress. Today I run outdoors with pure

inhibition. I

NOVEMBER 2016

Photo by Dave Meier Tomorrow was the day of the Migration. He double-checked his list. The supplies were packed and ready, everyone had been fed and was now waiting in the departure wing, the buses were set to arrive at 6 am sharp.

CHASING QUERENCIA

Grief is when the weight of missing someone sits on your chest, all 6000 pounds of it. Grief is crying so hard you can’t tell if you need a Kleenex for your eyes, your nose or your mouth. Grief is a flood of feelings that blocks out all reason and stops the moment; “where are. Read More. Grief is. February 23, 2020 Chasing Querencia ABOUT CHASING QUERENCIA Querencia is a Spanish term for that inner place from which to draw strength. It captures that feeling within that we strive to hold on to in times of struggle, or as we grow and learn about ourselves and our limits. Querencia is that voice inside that tells us to keep going, to

push through.

NEWS AND CULTURE

Photo by Annie Spratt When did we find a need to restore our faith in humanity? It feels like there was a collective moment we all exhaled and decided the world was full of monsters. WOMEN – CHASING QUERENCIA Photo by Francisco Moreno Often, when I read about feminism, its history, or current feminist movements, I get overwhelmed by the amount of information and

THE MIGRATION

Photo by Dave Meier Tomorrow was the day of the Migration. He double-checked his list. The supplies were packed and ready, everyone had been fed and was now waiting in the departure wing, the buses were set to arrive at 6 am sharp. Everything was

AUGUST 2016

7 posts published by Chasing Querencia during August 2016. Photo by Luis Llerena I remember reading a post from a psychologist who said one of the most common things people seek help for are issues involving their parents. SHORTSTORY – CHASING QUERENCIA Photo by Allef Vinicius It was almost midnight on the 9th of June when I was first initiated into the club. It was a hot summer night and I remember vividly the dress I was wearing. ADULTHOOD – CHASING QUERENCIA Photo by Azrul Aziz The past year has been one of the best and worst of my life. The pressure of adulthood as I rounded out my 27th year and entered my 28th felt crushing with the weight of realizing that the climb to being that someone my childhood self imagined had likely already taken place. HAPPINESS – CHASING QUERENCIA Photo by Azrul Aziz The past year has been one of the best and worst of my life. The pressure of adulthood as I rounded out my 27th year and entered my 28th felt crushing with the weight of realizing that the climb to being that someone my childhood self

GRATEFULLNESS

Photo by Azrul Aziz The past year has been one of the best and worst of my life. The pressure of adulthood as I rounded out my 27th year and entered my 28th felt crushing with the weight of realizing that the climb to being that someone my childhood self imagined had likely already taken place.

CHASING QUERENCIA

Grief is when the weight of missing someone sits on your chest, all 6000 pounds of it. Grief is crying so hard you can’t tell if you need a Kleenex for your eyes, your nose or your mouth. Grief is a flood of feelings that blocks out all reason and stops the moment; “where are. Read More. Grief is. February 23, 2020 Chasing Querencia ABOUT CHASING QUERENCIA Querencia is a Spanish term for that inner place from which to draw strength. It captures that feeling within that we strive to hold on to in times of struggle, or as we grow and learn about ourselves and our limits. Querencia is that voice inside that tells us to keep going, to

push through.

NEWS AND CULTURE

Photo by Annie Spratt When did we find a need to restore our faith in humanity? It feels like there was a collective moment we all exhaled and decided the world was full of monsters. WOMEN – CHASING QUERENCIA Photo by Francisco Moreno Often, when I read about feminism, its history, or current feminist movements, I get overwhelmed by the amount of information and

THE MIGRATION

Photo by Dave Meier Tomorrow was the day of the Migration. He double-checked his list. The supplies were packed and ready, everyone had been fed and was now waiting in the departure wing, the buses were set to arrive at 6 am sharp. Everything was

AUGUST 2016

7 posts published by Chasing Querencia during August 2016. Photo by Luis Llerena I remember reading a post from a psychologist who said one of the most common things people seek help for are issues involving their parents. SHORTSTORY – CHASING QUERENCIA Photo by Allef Vinicius It was almost midnight on the 9th of June when I was first initiated into the club. It was a hot summer night and I remember vividly the dress I was wearing. ADULTHOOD – CHASING QUERENCIA Photo by Azrul Aziz The past year has been one of the best and worst of my life. The pressure of adulthood as I rounded out my 27th year and entered my 28th felt crushing with the weight of realizing that the climb to being that someone my childhood self imagined had likely already taken place. HAPPINESS – CHASING QUERENCIA Photo by Azrul Aziz The past year has been one of the best and worst of my life. The pressure of adulthood as I rounded out my 27th year and entered my 28th felt crushing with the weight of realizing that the climb to being that someone my childhood self

GRATEFULLNESS

Photo by Azrul Aziz The past year has been one of the best and worst of my life. The pressure of adulthood as I rounded out my 27th year and entered my 28th felt crushing with the weight of realizing that the climb to being that someone my childhood self imagined had likely already taken place.

WHEN YOU ARE GONE

When I was 30 my father, 56, passed away suddenly from a brain tumor he was diagnosed with only 6 weeks before. This is a letter I wrote him a week before he passed. May 29, 2018 When you are gone I will remember your laugh You have many different kinds I am thinking now HOW TO LOVE YOUR PARENTS Photo by Luis Llerena I remember reading a post from a psychologist who said one of the most common things people seek help for are issues involving their parents. But, surprisingly, it wasn’t the relationships they had with their parents that caused them the most distress, it was the relationships they didn’t have. As kids, Skip to content Menu

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CHASING QUERENCIA

QUERENCIA: THAT INNER PLACE FROM WHICH TO DRAW STRENGTH

GRIEF IS…

Grief is when the weight of missing someone sits on your chest, all 6000 pounds of it. Grief is crying so hard you can’t tell if you need a Kleenex for your eyes, your nose or your mouth. Grief is a flood of feelings that blocks out all reason and stops the moment; “where are… Read More Grief is…

February 23, 2020

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Querencia

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VERY, VERY FAR APART Hey dad, it’s been a really long time. It hurts very much to open up that part of my mind and soul that’s missing you and acknowledge how much I’m still hurting and everything we’ve lost. I’m also still really traumatized from watching you die. I try not to think of it. I hold my… Read More Very, very far apart

September 9, 2019

Chasing Querencia

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WELCOME TO THE CLUB Photo by Allef Vinicius It was almost midnight on the 9th of June when I was first initiated into the club. It was a hot summer night and I remember vividly the dress I was wearing. Black with floral patterns with a bit of lace at the chest. Had I known that would be the… Read More Welcome to the Club October 22, 2018December 14, 2018

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DEAR BONNIE

When you are 5 you will get angry at how he cheats at all the games he plays with you, how he doesn’t tuck you in like mom, or let you sleep in their bed. You will wake up and be reminded that dad is sleeping because he is on evenings, which means he’ll be… Read

More Dear Bonnie

August 21, 2018August 22, 2018

Chasing Querencia

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AND YOU’LL SAY

WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. THIS IS A LETTER TO MY FATHER. July 30, 2018 Hi dad. Sorry it’s been so long. I’ve just been trying something else where I think of you fast and then I flash… Read More And you’ll say July 31, 2018July 31, 2018

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MONKEY FACES AND BOOK BURNINGS WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. THIS IS A LETTER TO MY FATHER. July 8, 2018 Hi Dad. Is it weird that I want to ask you what you did today? If I did I bet you’d say that… Read More Monkey faces and book burnings July 9, 2018July 9, 2018

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LONG HUGS AND LEATHER BOOTS WHEN I WAS 30, MY FATHER, 56, PASSED AWAY SUDDENLY FROM A BRAIN TUMOR HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ONLY 6 WEEKS BEFORE. THIS IS A LETTER TO MY FATHER. July 6, 2018 Hi dad. Sorry it’s been so long, it’s been a busy few weeks. I got the keys to the new apartment on June… Read More Long hugs and leather boots July 6, 2018July 9, 2018

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