CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF FUNTHE COMPLAINT DEPTF.A.QBOATLOAD OF

HOLIDAYSREVIEWS

Cap'n Wacky delivers a wide assortment of comedic diversions: The Unfortunate Page, Stick Figure Warning Man, Cap'n Wacky World, Zonar the Superion, lists, jokes, fun, and more. CAPNWACKY.COM'S THE UNFORTUNATE PAGE capnwacky.com's The Unfortunate Page. Click on the title of whichever gallery you want to peruse! (They're all pretty horrible) Please Don't Laugh At Us. An Unfortunate Card Speaks Out. By Mutant Pear-Head. I don't know why it happens. Maybe it's the way times change, maybe the world is full of hack artists, maybe the world is full of EGAD - YOUR PERSONAL FLEECING COMMUNITY - CAP'N WACKY Over 4 million items no one wants! Spend a Summer vacation in our Uncle Alan's guest room in the basement! No, Books! Books! Disclaimer So, if any folks from eBay or their high-powered attorneys happen to take a look at this, it's a parody, done with the utmost respect for the fine fine work you've done to serve humanity. CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF YULE Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

egg nog.

THE ANNOTATED WATCHMEN COMEDIAN, THE (1924-1985): Edward Morgan Blake. Began his career in 1939, cleaning up waterfronts in New York. He joined the Minutemen, and was expelled in 1940 for attempting to rape Sally Jupiter. He changed his yellow costume for heavier leather in 1941, and became a war hero in the Pacific. EGAD - YOUR PERSONAL FLEECING COMMUNITY Over 4 million items no one wants! Spend a Summer vacation in our Uncle Alan's guest room in the basement! No, Books! Books! Disclaimer So, if any folks from eBay or their high-powered attorneys happen to take a look at this, it's a parody, done with the utmost respect for the fine fine work you've done to serve humanity. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. Here we see a sad old maid desperately attempting to tie the knot before the rose falls completely off the bloom. I'd guess she's about 17. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The card was manufactured by spinsters for spinsters to send to spinsters. Whoever sent this card wouldn't even notice how bitter the back of the stamp tastes. LITTLE-KNOWN FACTS ABOUT MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG McGruff the Crime Dog's nephew and former sidekick, Scruff, was shot to death while the pair raided a crack house in 1995. McGruff the Crime Dog loves shoving his gun into a perp's mouth and growling, "take a bite out of THIS" right before pulling the trigger. McGruff the Crime Dog was genetically engineered by the government to be a

man-dog

REVIEWS: COMMERCIALS: FREECREDITREPORT.COM In this installment, our troubadour-narrator laments that he has been forced to take employment at a seafood restaurant, one of the kind that only exists in commercials or teen sex-comedy movies that forces its employees to wear silly oversized hats and themed-costumes. CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF FUNTHE COMPLAINT DEPTF.A.QBOATLOAD OF

HOLIDAYSREVIEWS

Cap'n Wacky delivers a wide assortment of comedic diversions: The Unfortunate Page, Stick Figure Warning Man, Cap'n Wacky World, Zonar the Superion, lists, jokes, fun, and more. CAPNWACKY.COM'S THE UNFORTUNATE PAGE capnwacky.com's The Unfortunate Page. Click on the title of whichever gallery you want to peruse! (They're all pretty horrible) Please Don't Laugh At Us. An Unfortunate Card Speaks Out. By Mutant Pear-Head. I don't know why it happens. Maybe it's the way times change, maybe the world is full of hack artists, maybe the world is full of EGAD - YOUR PERSONAL FLEECING COMMUNITY - CAP'N WACKY Over 4 million items no one wants! Spend a Summer vacation in our Uncle Alan's guest room in the basement! No, Books! Books! Disclaimer So, if any folks from eBay or their high-powered attorneys happen to take a look at this, it's a parody, done with the utmost respect for the fine fine work you've done to serve humanity. CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF YULE Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

egg nog.

THE ANNOTATED WATCHMEN COMEDIAN, THE (1924-1985): Edward Morgan Blake. Began his career in 1939, cleaning up waterfronts in New York. He joined the Minutemen, and was expelled in 1940 for attempting to rape Sally Jupiter. He changed his yellow costume for heavier leather in 1941, and became a war hero in the Pacific. EGAD - YOUR PERSONAL FLEECING COMMUNITY Over 4 million items no one wants! Spend a Summer vacation in our Uncle Alan's guest room in the basement! No, Books! Books! Disclaimer So, if any folks from eBay or their high-powered attorneys happen to take a look at this, it's a parody, done with the utmost respect for the fine fine work you've done to serve humanity. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. Here we see a sad old maid desperately attempting to tie the knot before the rose falls completely off the bloom. I'd guess she's about 17. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The card was manufactured by spinsters for spinsters to send to spinsters. Whoever sent this card wouldn't even notice how bitter the back of the stamp tastes. LITTLE-KNOWN FACTS ABOUT MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG McGruff the Crime Dog's nephew and former sidekick, Scruff, was shot to death while the pair raided a crack house in 1995. McGruff the Crime Dog loves shoving his gun into a perp's mouth and growling, "take a bite out of THIS" right before pulling the trigger. McGruff the Crime Dog was genetically engineered by the government to be a

man-dog

REVIEWS: COMMERCIALS: FREECREDITREPORT.COM In this installment, our troubadour-narrator laments that he has been forced to take employment at a seafood restaurant, one of the kind that only exists in commercials or teen sex-comedy movies that forces its employees to wear silly oversized hats and themed-costumes. EGAD - YOUR PERSONAL FLEECING COMMUNITY - CAP'N WACKY Over 4 million items no one wants! Spend a Summer vacation in our Uncle Alan's guest room in the basement! No, Books! Books! Disclaimer So, if any folks from eBay or their high-powered attorneys happen to take a look at this, it's a parody, done with the utmost respect for the fine fine work you've done to serve humanity. CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF YULE Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

egg nog.

AMALGAMATED HUMOR, INC. The CAP’N WACKY Story. Part One. Amalgamated Humor, Inc. had been going strong for several years, but co-presidents Brockie and Ichabod Lancaster White IIX were still frustrated by the company’s inability to adopt a corporate mascot that struck a chord with America. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Easter Cards. Here's a safety tip for Easter-. Never let your friends lure you out to the desert at midnight to look at giant eggs. They may have evil, evil rabbits in them. Or something. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE BIRTHDAY CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Easter Cards. Really, if this Easter Bunny came to deliver this egg to your house would you not have a complete

nervous breakdown?

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Yes, kids. There is an Easter Bunny, and he's a slave of the time-clock just like you will be when you grow up. Freedom is an

illusion.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The card was manufactured by spinsters for spinsters to send to spinsters. Whoever sent this card wouldn't even notice how bitter the back of the stamp tastes. CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF FUNTHE COMPLAINT DEPTF.A.QBOATLOAD OF

HOLIDAYSREVIEWS

Cap'n Wacky delivers a wide assortment of comedic diversions: The Unfortunate Page, Stick Figure Warning Man, Cap'n Wacky World, Zonar the Superion, lists, jokes, fun, and more. CAPNWACKY.COM'S THE UNFORTUNATE PAGE Please Don't Laugh At Us An Unfortunate Card Speaks Out By Mutant Pear-Head. I don't know why it happens. Maybe it's the way times change, maybe the world is full of hack artists, maybe the world is full of indiscriminate consumers, but for some reason, there sure are a lot of very bad greeting cards. CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF YULE Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

egg nog.

THE ANNOTATED WATCHMEN Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII Chapter VIII Chapter IX Chapter X Chapter XI Chapter XII. Characters. Timeline. Non-Comic Information THE ANNOTATED WATCHMEN Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII Chapter VIII Chapter IX Chapter X Chapter XI Chapter XII. Characters. Timeline. Non-Comic Information LITTLE-KNOWN FACTS ABOUT MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG McGruff the Crime Dog's nephew and former sidekick, Scruff, was shot to death while the pair raided a crack house in 1995. McGruff the Crime Dog loves shoving his gun into a perp's mouth and growling, "take a bite out of THIS" right before pulling the trigger. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Yes, kids. There is an Easter Bunny, and he's a slave of the time-clock just like you will be when you grow up. Freedom is an

illusion.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

REVIEWS: COMMERCIALS: FREECREDITREPORT.COM In this installment, our troubadour-narrator laments that he has been forced to take employment at a seafood restaurant, one of the kind that only exists in commercials or teen sex-comedy movies that forces its employees to wear silly oversized hats and themed-costumes. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF FUNTHE COMPLAINT DEPTF.A.QBOATLOAD OF

HOLIDAYSREVIEWS

Cap'n Wacky delivers a wide assortment of comedic diversions: The Unfortunate Page, Stick Figure Warning Man, Cap'n Wacky World, Zonar the Superion, lists, jokes, fun, and more. CAPNWACKY.COM'S THE UNFORTUNATE PAGE Please Don't Laugh At Us An Unfortunate Card Speaks Out By Mutant Pear-Head. I don't know why it happens. Maybe it's the way times change, maybe the world is full of hack artists, maybe the world is full of indiscriminate consumers, but for some reason, there sure are a lot of very bad greeting cards. CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF YULE Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

egg nog.

THE ANNOTATED WATCHMEN Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII Chapter VIII Chapter IX Chapter X Chapter XI Chapter XII. Characters. Timeline. Non-Comic Information THE ANNOTATED WATCHMEN Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII Chapter VIII Chapter IX Chapter X Chapter XI Chapter XII. Characters. Timeline. Non-Comic Information LITTLE-KNOWN FACTS ABOUT MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG McGruff the Crime Dog's nephew and former sidekick, Scruff, was shot to death while the pair raided a crack house in 1995. McGruff the Crime Dog loves shoving his gun into a perp's mouth and growling, "take a bite out of THIS" right before pulling the trigger. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Yes, kids. There is an Easter Bunny, and he's a slave of the time-clock just like you will be when you grow up. Freedom is an

illusion.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

REVIEWS: COMMERCIALS: FREECREDITREPORT.COM In this installment, our troubadour-narrator laments that he has been forced to take employment at a seafood restaurant, one of the kind that only exists in commercials or teen sex-comedy movies that forces its employees to wear silly oversized hats and themed-costumes. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE BIRTHDAY CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE ANNOTATED WATCHMEN Page 1, panel 1: The captions in that style are from the "Tales of the Black Freighter" comic the teenager is reading. They continue to appear on and off through the eleventh issue. Some of the panels later are excerpts from the comic. The story behind the comic itself is told

in issue #5.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Never let your friends lure you out to the desert at midnight to look at giant eggs. They may have evil, evil rabbits in them. Or something. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE CHRISTMAS CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Yes, kids. There is an Easter Bunny, and he's a slave of the time-clock just like you will be when you grow up. Freedom is an

illusion.

CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF FUN Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS I'm afraid I can't translate the inscription on this card, but whatever it says, I'm fairly sure it won't help me understand why someone might want to receive a card in which the AMALGAMATED HUMOR, INC. Yes, there was a better time in this country. A simpler time, free of governmental regulations. A time when common citizens were so fearful of industrial conglomerates, that a lawsuit was unthinkable. CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF FUNTHE COMPLAINT DEPTF.A.QBOATLOAD OF

HOLIDAYSREVIEWS

Cap'n Wacky delivers a wide assortment of comedic diversions: The Unfortunate Page, Stick Figure Warning Man, Cap'n Wacky World, Zonar the Superion, lists, jokes, fun, and more. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. Here we see a sad old maid desperately attempting to tie the knot before the rose falls completely off the bloom. I'd guess she's about 17. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Here we have famous performer Tom Thumb immortalized on a card in a photo from his wedding day. We also have evidence of a lazy photographer who didn't feel like resetting his camera after taking pictures of taller couples - the damn shot is nearly 50% head room. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

LITTLE-KNOWN FACTS ABOUT MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG McGruff the Crime Dog's nephew and former sidekick, Scruff, was shot to death while the pair raided a crack house in 1995. McGruff the Crime Dog loves shoving his gun into a perp's mouth and growling, "take a bite out of THIS" right before pulling the trigger. McGruff the Crime Dog was genetically engineered by the government to be a

man-dog

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE ST. PATRICK'S DAY CARDS I hope yez have as much good luck as I did. I survived the beating with only permanent bruises, bow legs, and twisted feetz. Also, I

can't spell.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The card was manufactured by spinsters for spinsters to send to spinsters. Whoever sent this card wouldn't even notice how bitter the back of the stamp tastes. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen crack whores about to take lie detector tests who seemed less uncertain about what they were about to go through with than these two. OK, I've never really seen that, but still they don't look excited, do they? THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen pamphlets in funeral homes about how to explain the concept of death to children that were cheerier than this wedding card. CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF FUNTHE COMPLAINT DEPTF.A.QBOATLOAD OF

HOLIDAYSREVIEWS

Cap'n Wacky delivers a wide assortment of comedic diversions: The Unfortunate Page, Stick Figure Warning Man, Cap'n Wacky World, Zonar the Superion, lists, jokes, fun, and more. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. Here we see a sad old maid desperately attempting to tie the knot before the rose falls completely off the bloom. I'd guess she's about 17. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Here we have famous performer Tom Thumb immortalized on a card in a photo from his wedding day. We also have evidence of a lazy photographer who didn't feel like resetting his camera after taking pictures of taller couples - the damn shot is nearly 50% head room. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

LITTLE-KNOWN FACTS ABOUT MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG McGruff the Crime Dog's nephew and former sidekick, Scruff, was shot to death while the pair raided a crack house in 1995. McGruff the Crime Dog loves shoving his gun into a perp's mouth and growling, "take a bite out of THIS" right before pulling the trigger. McGruff the Crime Dog was genetically engineered by the government to be a

man-dog

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE ST. PATRICK'S DAY CARDS I hope yez have as much good luck as I did. I survived the beating with only permanent bruises, bow legs, and twisted feetz. Also, I

can't spell.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The card was manufactured by spinsters for spinsters to send to spinsters. Whoever sent this card wouldn't even notice how bitter the back of the stamp tastes. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen crack whores about to take lie detector tests who seemed less uncertain about what they were about to go through with than these two. OK, I've never really seen that, but still they don't look excited, do they? THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen pamphlets in funeral homes about how to explain the concept of death to children that were cheerier than this wedding card. CAPNWACKY.COM'S THE UNFORTUNATE PAGE capnwacky.com's The Unfortunate Page. Click on the title of whichever gallery you want to peruse! (They're all pretty horrible) Please Don't Laugh At Us. An Unfortunate Card Speaks Out. By Mutant Pear-Head. I don't know why it happens. Maybe it's the way times change, maybe the world is full of hack artists, maybe the world is full of THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Yes, kids. There is an Easter Bunny, and he's a slave of the time-clock just like you will be when you grow up. Freedom is an

illusion.

AMALGAMATED HUMOR, INC. Yes, there was a better time in this country. A simpler time, free of governmental regulations. A time when common citizens were so fearful of industrial conglomerates, that a lawsuit was unthinkable. THE ANNOTATED WATCHMEN In their world, Nixon involved Dr. Manhattan in domestic and foreign affairs, enlisting his aid in winning the Vietnam War and bringing about economic prosperity. This led to great popularity on Nixon's part; in 1975 his administration sponsored a repeal of the 22nd amendment that would have limited him to 2 THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Here's our second card featuring marrying cats. This time, it looks like her family doesn't entirely feel welcome at the ceremony. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS You thought you were so clever. Didn't you, Mr. Chick, but now my rabbit-squad and I have you completely surrounded. Into the microwave

with him!

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS I'm afraid I can't translate the inscription on this card, but whatever it says, I'm fairly sure it won't help me understand why someone might want to receive a card in which the THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen pamphlets in funeral homes about how to explain the concept of death to children that were cheerier than this wedding card. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen crack whores about to take lie detector tests who seemed less uncertain about what they were about to go through with than these two. OK, I've never really seen that, but still they don't look excited, do they? CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF FUNTHE COMPLAINT DEPTF.A.QBOATLOAD OF

HOLIDAYSREVIEWS

Cap'n Wacky delivers a wide assortment of comedic diversions: The Unfortunate Page, Stick Figure Warning Man, Cap'n Wacky World, Zonar the Superion, lists, jokes, fun, and more. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. Here we see a sad old maid desperately attempting to tie the knot before the rose falls completely off the bloom. I'd guess she's about 17. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Here we have famous performer Tom Thumb immortalized on a card in a photo from his wedding day. We also have evidence of a lazy photographer who didn't feel like resetting his camera after taking pictures of taller couples - the damn shot is nearly 50% head room. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

LITTLE-KNOWN FACTS ABOUT MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOGMCGRUFF THE CRIME DOGOFFICER MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOGMCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG ADDRESSMCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG QUOTESMCGRUFF CRIME FIGHTING DOGMCGRUFF THE DOG CRIME

PREVENTION

McGruff the Crime Dog's nephew and former sidekick, Scruff, was shot to death while the pair raided a crack house in 1995. McGruff the Crime Dog loves shoving his gun into a perp's mouth and growling, "take a bite out of THIS" right before pulling the trigger. McGruff the Crime Dog was genetically engineered by the government to be a

man-dog

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE ST. PATRICK'S DAY CARDS I hope yez have as much good luck as I did. I survived the beating with only permanent bruises, bow legs, and twisted feetz. Also, I

can't spell.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The card was manufactured by spinsters for spinsters to send to spinsters. Whoever sent this card wouldn't even notice how bitter the back of the stamp tastes. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen crack whores about to take lie detector tests who seemed less uncertain about what they were about to go through with than these two. OK, I've never really seen that, but still they don't look excited, do they? THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen pamphlets in funeral homes about how to explain the concept of death to children that were cheerier than this wedding card. CAP'N WACKY'S BOATLOAD OF FUNTHE COMPLAINT DEPTF.A.QBOATLOAD OF

HOLIDAYSREVIEWS

Cap'n Wacky delivers a wide assortment of comedic diversions: The Unfortunate Page, Stick Figure Warning Man, Cap'n Wacky World, Zonar the Superion, lists, jokes, fun, and more. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. Here we see a sad old maid desperately attempting to tie the knot before the rose falls completely off the bloom. I'd guess she's about 17. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Here we have famous performer Tom Thumb immortalized on a card in a photo from his wedding day. We also have evidence of a lazy photographer who didn't feel like resetting his camera after taking pictures of taller couples - the damn shot is nearly 50% head room. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

LITTLE-KNOWN FACTS ABOUT MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOGMCGRUFF THE CRIME DOGOFFICER MCGRUFF THE CRIME DOGMCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG ADDRESSMCGRUFF THE CRIME DOG QUOTESMCGRUFF CRIME FIGHTING DOGMCGRUFF THE DOG CRIME

PREVENTION

McGruff the Crime Dog's nephew and former sidekick, Scruff, was shot to death while the pair raided a crack house in 1995. McGruff the Crime Dog loves shoving his gun into a perp's mouth and growling, "take a bite out of THIS" right before pulling the trigger. McGruff the Crime Dog was genetically engineered by the government to be a

man-dog

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE ST. PATRICK'S DAY CARDS I hope yez have as much good luck as I did. I survived the beating with only permanent bruises, bow legs, and twisted feetz. Also, I

can't spell.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The card was manufactured by spinsters for spinsters to send to spinsters. Whoever sent this card wouldn't even notice how bitter the back of the stamp tastes. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen crack whores about to take lie detector tests who seemed less uncertain about what they were about to go through with than these two. OK, I've never really seen that, but still they don't look excited, do they? THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen pamphlets in funeral homes about how to explain the concept of death to children that were cheerier than this wedding card. CAPNWACKY.COM'S THE UNFORTUNATE PAGE capnwacky.com's The Unfortunate Page. Click on the title of whichever gallery you want to peruse! (They're all pretty horrible) Please Don't Laugh At Us. An Unfortunate Card Speaks Out. By Mutant Pear-Head. I don't know why it happens. Maybe it's the way times change, maybe the world is full of hack artists, maybe the world is full of THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS Yes, kids. There is an Easter Bunny, and he's a slave of the time-clock just like you will be when you grow up. Freedom is an

illusion.

AMALGAMATED HUMOR, INC. Yes, there was a better time in this country. A simpler time, free of governmental regulations. A time when common citizens were so fearful of industrial conglomerates, that a lawsuit was unthinkable. THE ANNOTATED WATCHMEN In their world, Nixon involved Dr. Manhattan in domestic and foreign affairs, enlisting his aid in winning the Vietnam War and bringing about economic prosperity. This led to great popularity on Nixon's part; in 1975 his administration sponsored a repeal of the 22nd amendment that would have limited him to 2 THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Here's our second card featuring marrying cats. This time, it looks like her family doesn't entirely feel welcome at the ceremony. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS You thought you were so clever. Didn't you, Mr. Chick, but now my rabbit-squad and I have you completely surrounded. Into the microwave

with him!

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE EASTER CARDS I'm afraid I can't translate the inscription on this card, but whatever it says, I'm fairly sure it won't help me understand why someone might want to receive a card in which the THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS Your one stop for comedy on the web for parodies, original humor and

pants.

THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen pamphlets in funeral homes about how to explain the concept of death to children that were cheerier than this wedding card. THE CAP'N'S UNFORTUNATE WEDDING CARDS The Cap'n's Unfortunate Wedding Cards. I've seen crack whores about to take lie detector tests who seemed less uncertain about what they were about to go through with than these two. OK, I've never really seen that, but still they don't look excited, do they?

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THE COMPLAINT DEPT.

ALL THAT GLITTERS IS COLD

December 8th, 2011

Over in Flotsam & Jetsam, we’ve got the cover of an Unlikely Little Golden Book. It’s The Walking Dead! Head on over and check it out! Speaking of the dead, I bet you thought this site was among them, but here we are with new content… but in case we don’t check back in in the next couple of weeks, here’s a handy link back to our ol’ Christmas comedy section. TWITS & TWEETS: WINTHROP & IMPORTANT FACTS

April 7th, 2011

New today: Winthrop Merriweather Pinfeather-Smythe returns in “A Visit From Father” - a story in which our little gentleman’s pater returns from his latest adventure, and Winthrop sees an opportunity to get revenge on an enemy. It’s stands alone, but if you’d like to read earlier Winthrop tales too, you can find several on our Flotsam and Jetsam page. Elsewhere, several writers who have contributed to the Cap’n in the past, along with several who haven’t are now teaming up on Twitter bringing you Important Facts from Leading Scientists. If you’re Twitter, you’ll probably want to follow them here: http://twitter.com/#!/Important_Facts

SUPER SELF DENIAL!

March 9th, 2011

For lent, The Cap’n is giving up not updating this website! We’ve got a brand new entry in our Flotsam & Jetsam section: Super-Lent! Your favorite super-heroes tell us what they’re giving up for lent. Speaking of super-heroes. The Batman & Rockin’ series has wrapped up. you can see all of the bat-album covers here. ALL MATERIAL ON THIS SITE © 1999-2010 ITS RESPECTIVE AUTHORS. CAP'N WACKY, AMALGAMATED HUMOR, AND ZONAR © 1999-2010 BRODIE H.

BROCKIE & RJ WHITE